i used to be comfortable with my body.. i used to not care what people that about me. but now i just feel like i am not good enough.. not that i was before but still at least act like i am good enough.
i never realized how much emotional damaged i am.. maybe i need to just… i dont even know anymore. i cant believe how much emotion i had built up till today.
i feel like i cant be myself anymore. everytime i try to be myself i always get a judgement that just makes me depressed. what is the whole point of saying be yourself when every day people make remarks that want make them kill themselves just by being them. people now and days dont realize that the shit they say can cause a person to have a mental breakdown and just disappear.
OH and also today i told my dad about senior skip day and he is not letting me do it. he said i can afford to miss any more days. great i am probably going to be by myself the whole day.. GEE! i feel like i am trapped in a cage and just letting people throw trash at me like a monkey.
i am nothing but a thing in the world that doesnt make a difference in life. i am just a human that is waste. i am not sure what i am going to be doing anymore. no matter how hard i try, my work is never good enough. i am not good enough for me to love myself. i need time alone to think what i can do to be happy again because for the past few days i have been nothing but sad.. its amazing how people you know cant tell if you are faking a smile just so you dont get questioned.
well good night.
